One of the words I came across which completely allowed me to understand how people think is perception, what we perceive is a product of our life’s experiences and environment. This is so apparent when it comes to a sport like football. Every nation has its own individual style of play so the way a nation plays its football can be influenced by these environmental issues, the weather, the language, the economic factors and a multitude of other influences which shapes the way the game is played. Even a single individual can shape the way the game evolves and in the last 8 years, no one has revolutionised the game more than Pep Guardiola. The onset of technology has allowed virtually everyone who has an interest in the sport to gain access to his work as a manager and how he has shaped the way teams now play. I remember reading a blog from Gianluca Vialli when he was at Chelsea which he said that the reason why Italian teams are more tactical than English teams was that of the wind. Both countries experience relatively similar temperatures throughout the year but in the UK the wind makes everything worse. In Italy, it is normal for a coach to do stop-start tactical coaching for an hour at a time with players standing still listening to the coach but in the UK if you do that in the middle of winter players will freeze to death. Perhaps not the only reason why football is played differently but most likely another one of those environmental factors that shape the way things work.
Perception is generally the cause of all conflict, how we see things. We do not see the world as it is we see the world as we see ourselves, meaning we look at things with filters. The filters are our experiences, our traditions and our subsequent cultures that are created from the information which comes to us via the 5 senses. The 7 habits, is not just a book, its a manual for living a life based on principles. I do not want to offend anyone but for me, the 7 habits is a clear representation of religious scriptures without the need for parables, stories or specific individuals or deities as the focal point. The focal point of all of our behaviours and decision should be embedded in principles. These principles are what Steve Covey explains should be at your centre. Some people are self-centred others are work centred, career-centred or family centred etc. When you are principle-centred all your actions and decisions are based on these principles. principles are rules or laws that are permanent, unchanging, and universal in nature. They differ from values, values are internal and subjective, and they may change over time. A criminal gang can have values but if your values are centred on principles then your behaviour is influenced by these universal laws. One of the best lessons I learned early on was from Robert Kiyosaki who wrote the Rich Dad Poor Dad series of books. He said and I quote “There are three sides to every coin (Heads, Tails, and The Edge). Your ability to understand contrasting points of view and your ability to glean what information you believe to be valuable from each side is a crucial skill. Perception is the process by which people translate sensory impressions into a coherent and unified view of the world around them.
I recently watched a TED talk where a researcher and historian Rutger Bregman describes why people that are poor are perceived to be less intelligent or tend to make poor decisions. Once again I argue the point that it is the environment, through our experiences that create our views and beliefs. When we give our kids the tools, the opportunities and most importantly the example for a long healthy life we not only help our children to grow up safe and happy but we empower ourselves to do likewise. We must however first learn to remove the filters that have been engrained into our perceived notions. There is so much irony in society, irony which I was a part off and most likely am still a part of. The only way to see the apples from the pears is to begin to question everything we know, see and hear. You may be wondering why a football coach is discussing social psychology? Well, it is my belief that part of my job is to help parents, in some ways I believe helping the parents will directly influence what happens to the child, their attitude at training, their motivation and desires, the quality of the experience they are going to have, the quality of the child’s health and nutritional needs.
We the coach can influence the environment during training for a few hours every week. In many cases, I know that we have influenced many families to have a rethink on nutrition for their kids. We have influenced sideline behaviour which has made the experience for kids more enjoyable. The key to a successful football program incorporates the parents into the process for it is the parents that have the greatest influence on their children’s foundations. Books are the key to you and your children’s prosperity. My advice should you wish to take it is to introduce reading to your kids as soon as possible, make it an ingrained habit, many people make excuses, I don’t have time, I’m not a good reader. Then be a good listener, listen while you drive every trip is an opportunity to fill your mind with information that can help you. Habit 1, be proactive, is perhaps the most important of all the habits, habit 1 teaches us to be the masters of our own destiny.
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. Viktor E. Frankl”
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