Certainty. The need for security, stability, and reliability.
Variety/Uncertainty, the need for change, stimulation, and challenge.
Significance, the need to feel acknowledged, recognized and valued.
Love and Connection, the need to love and to feel loved, and to feel the connection with others.
Growth, the need to grow, improve and develop, both in character and in spirit.
Contribution, the need to give, to help others, and to make a difference.
Children have an incredible capacity to learn when engaged. If they enjoy what they are learning they will love learning and the side effects are that they grow in confidence and motivation. Coaching football gives us an incredibly fulfilling opportunity to make some real differences in people’s lives. We contribute towards their esteem and our words can make all the difference between a child that becomes self-actualized or a child that loses faith in his or her ability and in turn deprives them of the confidence that comes from being valued. For this reason, it is important to choose your words carefully, try to avoid shaming as shame today is the most harmful of all practices to bring one’s confidence to absolute zero. It is best to attempt to be empathic to situations which leave people in a vulnerable situation. Shame leads to a loss of self-worth. In return, people who are not taught to question will lack the mental strength to overcome or be exposed to vulnerability. If we all wake up tomorrow morning look in the mirror and say hell yeah I’m awesome just the way I am, entire economies would crumble!
As a parent, I have had to go through several paradigm shifts to keep up with the world my children have grown up in. Many of the things that I held firm beliefs have been challenged and much more are still being challenged. As I seek to learn and grow I am learning that many of our issues are born from the mental constructs that fill our heads. The invisible barriers that we see as all too real. Our aim is to provide an environment where children can learn real skills, football skills, and life skills. We do not aim to indoctrinate we aim to influence through life-governing principles. These principles we hold dear and they govern our every move. These include things like integrity, humility, fidelity, temperance, courage, justice, patience, industry, simplicity, modesty, love, trust and the Golden Rule. Steven Covey describes these principles in his book the Seven habits of highly effective people as the character ethic, today’s society is largely driven by the personality ethic. Success has become more a function of personality, of public image, of attitudes and behaviors, skills and techniques that lubricate the processes of human interaction. Unfortunately the personality ethic whilst it has its positives is derived from an outside-in approach or how Covey describes it your “circle of concern”. The character ethic is more of an inside-out approach, “circle of influence”. This means that people should look to focus on things they can control as opposed to things out of their control and by doing so it eliminates the game of blame and leads to looking within for solutions to any problem. It teaches kids that there are always three sides to a coin and that we should always seek to understand then to be understood. Responsibility, in a nutshell, means being responsible for everything, I would go so far as to say that everything is your fault even when it isn’t, this is because when you take full responsibility you get to keep your power when you don’t you give your power away.
The word success today transcends the wrong message. Today success is associated with being extremely good at something, whether it be sports or running a business. For me, success is the pursuit of happiness, love, relationships and most importantly having a mission in life a purpose. People who have no mission tend to settle and conform. Many people in today’s society have accomplished incredible things. These outliers such as Elon Musk is a perfect example, after selling PayPal he had enough wealth to buy several islands and retire sipping on Martinis as he puts it but that wasn’t for him, he has a mission, he wants humans to be an intergalactic species. He also has a mission to end the planets need for fossil fuels in other words he wants to save the planet. In doing so he almost lost every cent he acquired. Today he is recognized as one our societies top entrepreneurs. To get there he needed to be able to have a strong tolerance to pain, suffering and most important he needed to tolerate failure and use it as a way to move forward, he is a unique individual with a great mental capacity and whilst most of us could never contemplate doing what he has done there are lessons we can all learn. He has shown that we do not need to conform in fact a huge number of highly acclaimed people had all written him off, “it can’t be done”, he will bomb out, you can’t take on the automobile industry, you can’t build a rocket in America, electric cars won’t work, the list goes on and on, it’s a good thing that he did not listen and backed himself no matter what.
This is how Elon Musk will get us to MarsSometimes we know where we want to take our idea, but the journey can be the hardest part. Join 9 Spokes for FREE, connect your apps, and start seeing your business journey more clearly. https://goo.gl/8moYhV
Posted by Goalcast on Thursday, 7 December 2017
Intelligence cannot be influenced its a flame that must be inflamed all the time. We use football as a means to teach good habits, we use the games addictive environment to ensure that we can encourage a thirst for learning if in some part conformity exists in football it is to solidify good social and moral values, friendship, sportsmanship, fair play, emotional resilience, and connection. Lets teach children to question everything, lets encourage a natural curiosity but rather than give them the answers ask them to go find the answers, if anything it will teach them to read, to research, to analyze, to think and in the process they will gain knowledge, desire, skill and this will lead to wisdom which is the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgement; the quality of being wise.